The Purpose of Engagement

I have really been enjoying our last few lectures because they apply to life, right now, at this age, and in the next few years to come. Dating, Mate Selection, Engagement and Marriage are things I will (hopefully) be confronting in the next 3-4 years and lots of my friends are confronting engagement and marriage right now. It's crazy how many weddings I have to go to this summer! (I think the count is up to between 8 and 10 so far). So, they are all in the period of engagement right now. I have seen a couple situations in the past couple of years though where things haven't worked out so well, and a lot of it was because the engagement was almost all strictly based around the "event" of the wedding itself and not the life-long commitment of marriage. For those reasons I really enjoyed the quote Dr. Hollist mentioned from his grandfather I believe, who said that Marriage is the process, not the event, or something like that. It, once again, brought up the process factor that we have been reiterating through this whole class. I highly agree with it because when I talk to my parents about marriage and relationships or here talks on dating and such, they are always mentioning how there are many sacrifices involved with marriage and dating and many times people don't realize this. They only look at the roses and kisses side of things and don't think about the thorns or the slobber associated with those (I'm trying to make a metaphor here). And this process/event theory is something that does not only apply to marriage but life in general. I'm sure most of us have heard somewhere along the line that there has to be pain and suffering so there can be joy and happiness. And this is all a part of the process of life. It's something I think about, whether consciously or subconsciously, nearly every day. And lastly, another metaphor that goes along with all this that I recently heard from a friend, and that is the "roller coaster" metaphor. It basically says that life is like a roller coaster and when you're at the top you have to remember how it feels at the bottom and when you're at the bottom you have to remember how it feels at the top. I really like that metaphor and the one from Dr. Hollist's grandfather - life is made up of a series of events but it's the process in between where life really happens. Okay, lots of metaphors this time, but I hope that all made sense. It makes sense to me and I am definitly learning from it all....the process that is:)